38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Randomize
