We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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