there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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