i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I think I sprained my soul last night
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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