we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Randomize
