did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
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