i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
