you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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