Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize