He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
