She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
