do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
