it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I just gift wrapped bread.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
There are leaves in my underwear?
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