What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
