i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
