i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
