i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize
