He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
