Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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