If i come over, it means nothing
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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