Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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