I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Randomize