i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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