but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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