people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
We're too hungover to prance.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
