i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
The best revenge is premature balding
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
