i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
they need to just BURY HIM!
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
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