Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Randomize
