i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
