well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
