I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Randomize
