Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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