I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
from now on my penis is your penis
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize