i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
