how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
