Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
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