The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
