I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Randomize
