drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
