Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
it's great music for shaving your balls
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
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