I will die if light touches me.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
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