I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Randomize
