Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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