Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
