**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
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