So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
