Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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