Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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