I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
