..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
